Kids · Parenting · Rants · Ridiculousness · Soccer

Mother Nature is a Real A** Hole Today

I’m really trying to have a positive attitude here about coming back to Ohio from California but Mother Nature is being a real ass hole. We have 2 soccer games today. One at 2:30 then at 6. So we will be spending the majority of our time outside today. Unfortunately, I’ll be wearing my rain boots and using an umbrella. I’ll probably be crying while doing both.

I woke up today at 11:17 a.m. When either one of us sleeps in, the other is given carte blanche to say,

“Well….well…..well…..look who decided to wake up!”

I think this was my biggest well, well, well welcome.

“Look, I have jet lag. My body thinks it’s 8:17!” I protested.

I mean, let’s compare and contrast the weather right now.

Where I will be today.
Where we were the past 5 days.

So you can see why this is sucking so bad. Oh, I just now noticed something. Mother Nature decided to cool it with the rain at 8PM. Thanks a lot Mother Nature, that’s really too kind of you. Maybe you could have moved up that 1 hour of no rain to an hour it would have been daylight so I could have at least seen the no rain.

BTW, Mother Nature, global warming is your own damn fault. If you would throw us a bone every so often (like have 1 hour of no rain and no clouds) in the midwest, we wouldn’t have to consider moving to already densely populated, West coast cities to soak up the sun.

P.S. I am not blaming Mother Nature for global warming. All the trolls of the world can go back in their caves or under their bridges and go back to sleep. The weather is just making me mad and I need to blame it on someone or something so I whine like a 4-year-old. I fully acknowledge that as a mid-westerner we are contributing to the demise of the Earth too. Maybe as Midwesterners, we wouldn’t have to use so much electricity if IT WAS SUNNY OUTSIDE!!!


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17 thoughts on “Mother Nature is a Real A** Hole Today

    1. Ritu, I’m not going to lie. I’m having a REALLY tough time coming back here. I just sat there at the soccer game, freezing my ass off, looking for some sort of break in the clouds. Nothing. From the minute we got to L.A. to the time we left, it was sunny ALL THE TIME!

  1. Freezing rain, power outages, sleet and ice pellets is what we have today. It also means that I’m not driving back home today….instead staying at my brother’s place.

    1. I hate this weather so much. This winter has bent us over and I feel like it’s never going to end! Even today we are to get flurries. What’s it gonna do? Snow in May? I’ve never seen snow in May.

      1. Ugh same here!! I just checked online and the roads are apparently bare all the way home so I’m going to start out in a little bit. I dont care if its going to be raining just as long as the roads are clear of ice and snow

  2. If it’s any consolation it’s going to be a high of 64 degrees tomorrow!! That means probably high 50’s in Marina del Rey!!

    1. No F, that is no consolation what so ever. Day 2 on being back and it’s nothing but grey, low, thick clouds. And we have seagulls flying over. WTF is that all about. It’s like they are taunting me or something.

    1. Alas, my sunshine isn’t enough. 🙁 I’m afraid I need mother nature’s help but I think she too went on vacation. It was probably to California and that’s probably why we have 0 sun and no warm air.

    1. Listen, you have it worse than me. I fully acknowledge this. I will also acknowledge that I’m fed up with this weather and I can either sit here every year and be miserable or I can say fuck it and do something about it. I’m done, tapping out. crying Uncle. Mother Nature can have the Midwest. I’m moving.

      1. as a non-native, I’m down with this plan—especially if you can get everyone to agree. I’m not interested in your “seasons” (autumn is the only one y’all get right anyway) and your humidity can go take a flying leap (I don’t have gills!) but the one thing I’ve gotten used to is the Midwestern Nice. At first I thought y’all were fucking with me, but especially way up here people are suuuuper nice. A stranger in front of me apologized for taking so long to order and offered to pay for my coffee this morning. That’s practically Canadian.

        1. OMG…we are almost Canadian, right?! I’ve had 2 people in front of me buy my orders so far at drive thrus! So nice! Yeah, not a big fan of the humidity though I’ve felt worse in Florida and Texas.

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