Folks, I’m goin’ to Florida next Wednesday! Sure, I’m going to a county that has about the same amount of Coronavirus cases as our second-highest county in Ohio but tomatoes-tomatos. Right? Or something like that. Anyway, the point is, I need, nay, we need a vacation, like yesterday.
I talked about looking for a vacation house in Florida a few weeks ago. I even wrote about it, lovingly entitled the post If the Golden Girls and the Tiger King Collaborated, because that’s what most of the interior decoration looks like. There’s a huge amount of faux tiger skin, faux ivy and pastel sofas everywhere. It got to the point where the minute I saw a maroon color living room or a duvet circa 1991, I swiped left.
Dream Vacation Home
Then I found it, a vacation home on VRBO that left me Googling how much can I get for donating plasma. I began to add up how many masks I would have to sell to pay for the house. Would you like to see what I was willing to donate plasma for? With the blessing of the owner, he’s ok with me posting pics of this amazing house.
My first time in a beach house? It was with my in-laws in Hilton Head. I wasn’t 11, I was twenty-something. Do you know where Chris and I slept? We slept on an air mattress…all week….in a bathroom….my in-laws’ bathroom. So again, if anyone bitches about the accommodations, my rule of no food in the bedrooms (we’re not losing that $500 deposit), sitting on sofas with wet trunks or generally leaving shit all over the place, I will lose my mind!
And if you guys want to check out more pictures of the home or need a vacation in a non-Tiger King type of house, here is the link to the actual home. Tell them Hot Mess sent you! 😉
P.S. Are you guys vacationing anywhere or still not ready? If you are, I’d love to read in the comments where you are going!