I’m Gonna Drive My Car Into the Unemployment Office

Before I get banned from everything, chill the fuck out, I’m not running my car through the unemployment office. Though I have jokingly said this more than once. Actually it was as recent as 2 hours ago in the grocery store line to a stranger who attempted to school me on why companies are understaffed. I shut that shit down with my declaration of vehicular homicide.

My blog isn’t political and I’m not going to make this political. This is just simply a gal who has experienced enough stress to make 10 400-lb men becoming raging alcoholics. There were times over the past year I just put my head down on my desk (whether it be in the office or the home office) and either closed my eyes or just cried. Sure, I haven’t reached the level of crying in the shower or rocking back and forth while sucking my thumb thank God. I figured I’d save those coping mechanisms for 2022 and whatever fresh hell it has in store for us.

And I’m not even talking about having to wait longer for a table or in line at the grocery store. I’m talking about the dumbest things that make my life hell at work. For anyone that doesn’t know, I’m a food buyer for a distribution company. I buy disposables or in Layman’s terms: doggie bags, napkins, disposable forks, etc. Apparently during my background check they found out my disdain of cooking and put me in charge of the stuff I couldn’t screw up.

Let me give you an example of what my current hell is. How many times recently have you walked into Starbucks and there is a long list of product outages? Maybe you received a message on your favorite food app that due to supply chain shortages, some food choices may not be available? Yes, that is my current hell. Do you know there is a nationwide chicken wing shortage as well as a starch?

Substitutions

Take for instance one of my favorite restaurants. 7 months ago, your take-out food would be placed in a chic, little white shopping bag, proudly displaying their label. 3 months ago when those ran out, they placed it in a chic, little white bag, minus the label. And now? You’re lucky to get a plastic white bag that says THANK YOU, running down the front.

Crazy Laugh

On more than one occasion, I find myself sitting back in my desk chair and crazy laughing. What is crazy laughing? It’s when things are so bad, in lieu of cry or screaming, you just sit there and laugh uncontrollably. About a month ago, after reviewing my 4th shorted truck of the day, I just sat there and laughed. My friend/co-worker came up about this time and here’s how the conversation went:

Me laughing hysterically: “I have my 4th truck that showed up with about 2 cases on it out of 1,300. I literally don’t know what to do at this point,” I said throwing my hands in the air.

Apparently, my laugh was infectious because she started laughing too.

“And all I can do is laugh at this point because it’s so ridiculous! I mean, my dressing supplier is out of dressing!” I yelped, barely able to get the words out between the crazy giggles. Doubled over, I laughed so hard I started crying. She started crying too, wiping her index fingers under her eyes, for fear of her mascara running.

And Can You Blame the Unemployed?

And as mad as it makes me about people exercising the extended unemployment when they could be working, I can’t blame them. I mean I wouldn’t do it because you aren’t going to be able to bullshit the interviewer when they ask why there was a 14-month gap between employment. But honestly, most people don’t wake up and say “I want to be paid less to work more.” No! Most people want to be paid the most to do the least and right now, the extended unemployment is making it possible. And before the Karens and Social Justice Warriors of the internet sit down for a long, drawn-out comment, just save it for Facebook or something, alright? I know there are caveats. I know there are some who are truly trying and blah, blah, blah. You know deep down what I’m talking about so cool the SJW jets.

So how has the current economical climate affected you and your job? Is it as stressful as last year? Less stressful? Are you even back in the office? Would love to hear what your work life is like these days!

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