Car Purgatory

car purgatory

I am in car purgatory. I grew up Catholic so I understand that purgatory is a place between heaven and hell. Shit can go one of two ways. I have let my house get dirtier, I’ve ignored blogging……like legit everything. All in the name of the mighty car.

Let me preface this by saying my car is 18 years old. It’s been a good little car but it’s a fucking death trap at this point. It’s a Toyota Corolla that I purchased in 2002. Yes, that’s what I said, 2002.

For the past 8 days I’ve logged on to,,, and lastly to find the following specs:

  • 2016-2019 year
  • Panoramic roof (if I say panoramic sunroof one more time, my 11-year-old will disown me)
  • Must have the larger screen on the dash.
  • 50k miles or less
  • $15K or less in cost
  • Black then red then silver
  • Heated seats and push start not necessary but would love

And you know what? I can’t find this fuckin’ car with my specs ANYWHERE! Not joking, I’ve contacted dealers in the following states:

  • California
  • Colorado
  • Florida
  • Indiana
  • Pennsylvania

It’s become a mission. I will find this car, with the specs I want as God is my witness. Like legit, my muscles ache from sitting in uncomfortable positions, researching it online.




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