I’m so excited for the royal wedding I can’t even stand it!
When I was 4 and came down for breakfast, my mom had the little tiny 4″ black and white tv on at the table. When I peered in, I saw a woman in a big white gown.
“Who’s that?” I asked.
“That’s the princess,” my mother responded.
“That can’t be the princess, her hair’s short.”
In my tiny little mind, I couldn’t fathom that a princess didn’t have long hair. It came with the territory after all.
Oh my God, this wedding….this wedding was beautiful. Kate Middleton was so gorgeous and so classy. Still is. Now I have a question for my friends across the pond. What do you think of Kate Middleton? I ask because after going on Pinterest and reading the memes, they weren’t in her favor. There is one however that is so fuckin’ funny, I had to share it with you. Moms, how true is this?
So I digress. I watched that wedding in 2011. It was everything I could have asked for.
And now we are just under 48 hours from when Prince Harry marries Megan Markle. Folks say it’s the most modern royal wedding yet but I don’t know if that’s the case. Perhaps we should say it’s the most inclusive. Had someone told the king or queen of England, 100-years-ago that one of their ancestors would not only marry a commoner but a multiracial American; well, they would have probably used the fainting sofa.
And why are Americans so excited about this wedding? Is it because one of our own is now going to be considered a royal? Honestly, that doesn’t draw me to the wedding. What draws me to the wedding is it’s the closest thing to a real life fairytale. Where else can you watch princesses, princes and queens, parading about? You can’t. And as an American, I feel like we totally got shafted when it comes to the whole royal thing. If I had lived back in the 1700’s and caught word we were trying to separate from England, I would have been like,
“Now hold your horses people….do we still get to have queens and kings?”
Royal Watch Party
Now of course by now you know these ladies. As usual, we will be spending another weekend in a hotel for a soccer
tournament and we will all be together. NC suggested a royal watch party and I couldn’t say yes fast enough. When we found out it’s at 7 am our time, AF was less than enthused.
I had big plans to make each of us fascinators and bought was I thought was the proper materials. After starting the process last night, I threw it against the wall and screamed, “fuck it”.
The problem was that the fascinators called for sinamay squares. I used sinamay ribbon. The feathers were to be cocktail feathers. I bought the ghetto-fabulous $1.99 bag of assorted feathers. Had I gone through with our fascinators, we would have looked like an indian drag queen.
I accepted not long ago that we will be watching the royal wedding without fascinators. I’ve searched every fabric store for sinamay squares and cocktail feathers and nobody has ANYTHING! You’d think between the royal wedding and the Kentucky Derby, they would have a small offering of materials to make fascinators but no, no we don’t. We have stupid fabric offered with the likes of Pooh Bear or Holly Hobby staring up at you like, “fuck you and your royal watch party. It ain’t happening.”
So tell me, will all of you be watching? They are predicting 3 billion viewers across the globe. Knowing my luck, I’d probably trip over my feet with that many people watching.