My Review of Dairy Queen’s New Funnel Cake

Dairy Queen funnel cake

I am pissed off at Dairy Queen. More importantly, I am pissed at myself for not handing the 4 treats back to the nose pierced teenager and demanding my money back. What is this cruel joke?

The Blizzard

Dairy Queen BlizzardI love the cheese quake blizzards but always found the small size too large. Rejoice! A few years ago they came out with a mini for like $1 and some change. Fast forward to today and to the left is what I was given. What was this abomination?

 

 

 

 

 

 

And here is the kicker, that little dixie cup, was $2.99….a piece. I have never in my life paid this much for such little ice cream. Are you serious? This spec of a treat measured a lofty 3″ in height. When she handed me my tray of treats I looked at her as if she had handed me a bag of snakes. I didn’t know if I should hand it back or drive on and complain. I chose the latter.

The Funnel Cake

Dairy Queen funnel cakeWhat gets me the most is the “funnel cake” my son ordered. He saw the commercials running all the time and couldn’t wait to try one. When it was handed to me, I pulled away, about 20′ forward and immediately stopped, grabbed my phone and took this picture.

I began to rant.

“That’s it! We are never coming to Dairy….o.k. we will probably come to Dairy Queen again but it will be with coupons or we will just be ordering vanilla ice cream. No, you know what? We aren’t going to Dairy Queen again. We are going to go to a mom-pop ice cream place from now on, where we won’t be charged $14 bucks for 4 flippin’ mini deserts!”

“Can I have my spoon?” My son asked like he was asking for you to turn the light on. He didn’t care about the cost nor the injustice that had just taken place. I handed him back the red spoon.

Oh, and here are a few of DQ’s advertisements of said “funnel cake” I hold in my hand.

Does this…..                                                              look like this……..

dqs funnel cake advertising

dq funnel cake measured

The “funnel cake” was approximately 3″ in diameter. I get that it’s not going to be the size of a Ferris wheel but come on. This was blatant false advertising not to mention I paid $4.29 for this f’ing thing.

So friends in summary, should you wish to get bent over by an ice cream establishment, choose Dairy Queen. If you want to pretend Dairy Queen has tapas, choose the “funnel cake”. I am done, maybe, with Dairy Queen.

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