Ok, we need to have a serious discussion about man buns. The bun in general is usually awful to begin with but then put it on a burly man and suddenly my eyes are bleeding. And for any man out there reading this, cusping his bun and questioning this decision…take it out. You heard me…grab your purple GOODY elastic and throw it away NOW! If you don’t then throw your manhood instead. Purple elastic or manhood….those are your 2 options. I trust you’ll do the right thing.
So where is this contempt for a harmless hairstyle coming from? I’ll tell you where. Against my will I was forced to watch Gotham with my husband and kids. As a team player I didn’t want to be the ass hole and not participate in this riveting drama Monday night.
Apparently the main character goes to prison. In the common area or whatever you call it, there is a fight about to break out. I took it about as serious as a fight in the school yard of a Barney episode. The bitches of Orange is the New Black scared me more than these classically trained, well coiffed actors attempting to be inmates. Then in the background I saw it. One of the inmate extras was wearing a man bun with his perfectly pressed grey prison shirt and his perfectly pressed pant.
I don’t think so buddy. This isn’t how it’s works. I’ve never been to prison but I’m guessing the odds are NOT in your favor of not being ass raped should you show up on your first day with a man bun. Why? Because men don’t wear buns!
“No, no! That is not how it works!” I proclaimed. “Prisoners don’t wear buns.”
My sons looked at me like I had 2 heads and honestly I really didn’t care. I was pissed at this innacurate portrayal of our penal system and the wearing of a man bun. Should I see any more prison man buns I’ll be forced to call it the vaginal system in lieu of the penal system as that seems to be where it’s heading.
Ok, I’m done sounding like a crotchety old woman. I’m off to watch Empire and I swear to God I am going to loose my shit if I see a man bun in tonight’s episode.
I totally agree. I have an irrational hatred towards man buns. I get so angry when I see one. There should be a law passed that makes it legal to snip one off when you see it.
OMG…so I’m watching Empire and a Toyota Corolla commercial comes on. And do you know what one of the actors had the audacity to say? It was something like “I’ll grow a man bun.” Come again? I even had to ask my husband if he really just said that. The man bun is neither stylish or fashionable. Last time I checked, women don’t fantasize over pulling a man’s bun down so their hair sweeps over their shoulders.
I knew we were friends for a reason!! As soon as I saw the title of your post, I knew I had to give you this youtube video. It’s called “stop the knot”. Not only does the main guy have the most rocking moustache in the existance of hipster moustaches, and the most fabulous accents, but it is a great was to spend 4 minutes. You are welcome.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a8YgTaMyZRk
Then they posted an apology….. “charity work being friends with a ginger” haha the moustache dude at the end?! OMG
Who the hell are these people? That was hilarious! My favorite part is the conversation he was having with his mustache. I seriously thought it was real. He was pretty hot….the one on the right….not the one on the left but you probably figured that out anyway. Ha!!!
I have no idea who these people are but I knew you’d like it! When his mustache came off at the end I almost died! WOW!
Now if we could get a plastic surgeon on the line to fix his inevitable ear lobe damage of those awful disks.
hehe totes!
I don’t get notifications when you reply to comments anymore!! 🙁 nooooooo
Well shit! Ok, let me harass them to figure that out.
I think I am too old for either the man buns or the strange facial hair (twirly mustaches and beards that look like larks live in there).
I mean I am sure the stache’ was great in 1885 but come on!!!!
One of my co-workers just showed up a few days ago with one of these monstrosities. I couldn’t stop staring at it
You should’a cut the damn thing out. There should be a man bun tax.
Just stopping by to confirm: I have been to a men’s prison (long story) and the number of man buns was ZERO. Oh, but they’ll make cosmetics out of the damnedest things! I was really impressed at the ingenuity and commitment I witnessed… but no man-buns. I didn’t ask their opinion on those, specifically, but I imagine that A) they’re not allowed to have elastics and B) aw HELL naw.
Right?!?! The only time I would envision an inmate wearing a man bun is when his boyfriend demanded role play and that would be of a naughty librarian?? IDK???
Exactly. The man bun is stupid and there are no hairstyles happening in prison!