Do you live alone? Perhaps you have no one to answer to except for yourself. Or like me, perhaps you have a spouse and children. It’s gotten to the point where some of the below happens, and all you can do is laugh. Check out my examples below and let me know if you are lucky enough to deal with it too.
How to Be a Decent Human Being At Home
Coke Can in the Sink
Did you get that from Pottery Barn?
Oh this is my favorite, when someone places an empty coke can in the sink. I’m sorry, are we reusing soda cans now? I know when restaurants want to be all folksy, they immediately use their go-to method of folksiness- canning jars as glasses but this is on a whole new level. It doesn’t happen often but when it does, I immediately turn to my husband and oldest (the young one doesn’t drink coke yet) and ask if we’ll be reusing the cans this evening. If it’s trash, throw it away. Don’t be that person.
Keep Pressing the Trash Down
Why do people push the trash down to avoid taking out the trash? In case you were wondering, there isn’t a secret door under the trash that immediately opens to allow the trash to just go away. It will still be there. Then when I go to take it out, everything leaks and guess who has to clean it up? Me. Don’t be lazy!
Replace the Toilet Paper
Ok, now this one can be excusable under certain circumstances. Those circumstances being when I buy the mega-roll of TP that barely fits the holder. Occasionally we will leave the mega roll on the sink till it gets down to a circumference where we don’t have to worry about it popping up while your on the toilet and scaring the bejesus out of you (what is bejesus anyway? I probably didn’t even spell it right). But yesterday I found this and a normal size roll, sitting on the sink. You cold have changed out the roll while sitting on the toilet but apparently you prefer a more rustic feel of the bathroom. Hell, why don’t we just get rid of indoor plumbing and go with an outhouse?
If you use the last of the toilet paper, refill it. And don’t leave 1 square of toilet paper in an effort to avoid changing it. That doesn’t count.
Returning Things Where They Should Be
This one cracked me up. I went to make myself a sandwich yesterday and stopped as I looked at the bread box with all the bread on the outside. I even opened it to see if maybe it was full. It was empty. So everyone made their hot dogs and sandwiches and found it too difficult to slide the lid open and place the bread back inside. Oh my God!
Hanging Up Your Coat
I’ve attempted to make this idiot proof and have obviously failed in this endeavor. I installed 3M hooks in the front room so everyone could just hang their coat if they found opening the closet too difficult. Why does everyone hang their coat on the back of a chair? What are you doing? Reserving a seat?
Flushing the Toilet After #2
It’s amazing the number of trolls that live at our house because when I ask who crapped in the toilet and didn’t flush, my children look at me like, ‘wait! We have a toilet?’ Both fight to defend their good name, citing alibis and offering to to have the turds tested for DNA. But it gets better. On more than 1 occasion, the toilet has turds and no toilet paper! Am I raising hayseeds?
So what do you think? What are other ways we can all be decent human beings at home?
For more How To Be a Decent Human Being posts, check them out here…..
This resonates with me on so many levels. My husband gets annoyed with me about the rubbish bin but leaves his water bottles or other recyclable items on the kitchen bench and never puts away in the recycling bin (which is under the kitchen bench) it infuriates me!! Every time I go home to visit my parents (not exaggerating here) I have to replace the loo roll. Every. Single. Time. It’s so annoying!
Gurrlllll…..that is exactly why I wrote this piece! My husband leaves water bottles on the sofa. I don’t understand! This isn’t a frat party! Do you have those in England? As for the loo roll, I’m surprised you have to do it at your parents. Usually older people are more responsible about stuff like that. I just don’t understand the laziness! I mean our bathroom is so small you could sit there and change it while you go!
We have uni student parties which I imagine are similar. I think it’s just it runs out every time I pop to the loo so annoying as it’s in a cupboard not arms length reach away! Have to check so I’m not caught short haha.
The trash can thing (or “rubbish bin” as we call it over here), is my pet hate. People are only making it more difficult for themselves when they’re eventually forced to empty the bin. At University, I used to be the pain in the arse housemate that always moaned at others for not emptying the bin. And I still do that now with my husband haha.
And you wanna know the thing that pisses me off more than anything? When I call people out on it (i.e. You are only pushing it down so you don’t have to take the rubbish bin out), I am accused of not being practical and wasting liners b/c more stuff can go in them. NO IT CAN’T AND I’LL GIVE YOU THE STUPID PENNY YOU FEEL I AM WASTING! Grrr! I feel like I could write a part 2 to this but I need more ideas of how people are lazy around the house.
My husband likes to leave his dirty washing by the laundry bin. Not in it, but just next to it, on the floor. He must assume the magic laundry fairies pick up the dirty washing and place it WHERE IT SHOULD BE.
YES! OMG! My husband does the EXACT same thing! Why is that so difficult? Hilarious!
Okies, so since I’ve half taken over the house mother duties at the 2nd house, I am finding a lot of little things like this!!
1) taking food to their rooms and NOT bringing the dishes back out. Like I’m sorry but when you bring a moldy spoon out where the mold has GROWN INTO THE METAL OF THE SPOON, I want to stab you in the eye with said spoon.
2) taking your lunch containers from school lunches and just leaving them on the counter with food in them. There is a compost bucket and a sink – you know where both of them are!
3) letting things boil over on the stove and then having the pot (inside and out) covered in burnt food.
My sons bring food into their rooms all the time! Just this morning I looked in to C’s room to see an opened box of cinnamon toast crunch and a cup, complete with a straw on his bunk bed. Seriously if mold grows, I just throw the dis/cutlery away. I’ll never be able to forget that memory so it’s best that way.
Yeah same here! But these are teenagers and the one who is doing it is 19 and he has half the plates in his room and never goes to school so the cleaner doesn’t even get to go in there and bring them out
Well he is just an f’ing savage then. WTH?
Lol I know!! He was in the kitchen until 2 am last night apparently…on the phone keeping the other girls up…so tonight I sent a message just reminding him 1030 is quiet time and when he said sorry i just said “get a good rest for school tomorrow!” Hopefully he’ll actually go…
You are so nice to them!!
I try to be! Lol sometimes it takes a lot of self control haha
I feel your pain. Although life in the household has improved since the oldest has moved out. My husband and I are already making plans to visit her this summer. We will eat food in her living room and then leave the dishes on the floor or furniture. I will use all of the toilet paper and not replace the roll, I will leave my underwear and other clothing laying all over her house on the floor. We are also planning to eat all of the food in the house. I will also be sure to complain loudly about the lack of good food and movie channels available at her house. It’s been a long time coming and I am really looking forward to this vacation.
Oh my God! At first I read this like this was your daily habit and I’m like, OMG…..they live like animals. But then I reread it and that is HILARIOUS! You are sooo deserving of this and I look forward to a complete update on how your daughter takes your inability to clean up after yourself. This will be priceless!
I have waited 23 years to do this 🙂
It is why God put you on this Earth. You must! For all of us moms that don’t have that opportunity yet. This is your destiny.
Well, if you put it that way! I will not disappoint!
CHERIE! CHERIE! CHERIE!