“Mom, my zit hurts so bad!” My 12-year-old exclaimed. He comes closer to me, into the light.
“Dear God! How do you not pop that thing? Jesus!” I yelp, upon seeing a large pussy zit on my son’s head.
We were all in the kitchen putting away groceries while this was going on. His zit is massive. It’s at the top left of his forehead, right at his hairline. I can’t be certain but I think I saw a pulse. I remember zits like that and they were easy. My son is treating this thing like I’m asking him to squeeze puss out of an infected wound. Sorry, too much?
“P, just pop it. You’ll feel so much better.” My husband chimes in.
“Look, if you don’t pop that thing, it better not spray out over our tacos. K?” I add.
“Mom! That’s gross.” He protests.
“I’m just sayin….”
After Dinner
My son and I sit at the table after dinner and chat for a few. I can’t help but have my eyes creep up to his zit. It’s looking at me.
“Mom, quit looking at it!”
“I can’t help it! It’s like you have a third eye. I don’t know which one to look at,” I say as if I’m facing someone who has the one eyeball that veers off into the distance and your like, which eyeball do I look at?
“You don’t understand!” He protests.
“Yeah, your mom and I totally don’t understand,” my husband responds sarcastically.
“I get zits on my wrinkles for cryin’ out loud!” I say dramatically. “Maybe we should name it! You know, like the lump I have at the back of my head. How about we name it Bubbles.”
“That’s obnoxious.” P says.
“Your right. We need a normal name for it. How about Mark?”
“But is it a girl?” My 8-year-old asks.
“That’s a great question C. P. Is your zit a girl or a boy?”
“I don’t know,” he says, thoroughly annoyed with all of the attention.
“Well then it’s probably best we choose a name that is gender neutral. Hmmm….”
“How about Pat?” My husband asks.
“Yeah, there we go,” I say thinking that name is completely over used and stupid.
“We are not naming my stupid zit!” P explodes.
“Ok…ok……how about tambourine?”
At least Pat isn’t on his butt…those are the worst.
Omg…you are so right! Good call! A zit he can absolutley keep to himself!
OMG! Your life is so magically funny sometimes! I can never let a pimple go unpopped. It annoys me so much.
THANK YOU! I can’t either. It’s almost out of respect of our fellow man we pop it before going out in public!
I know people who wont pop them at all because they think its better for your skin to not pop them. But I cant deal with it! My skin is so sensitive though it looks horrible if its popped or not
Ugh, when I was around 11 or 12 I had a HUGE zit right on my nose. The boy I liked called me Rudolph. It was horrifying. And, I’m still getting them. What’s the deal with that?! When does it stop?!
I don’t know how old you are but I’m 40 and the damn zits still come! And that’s a true story about having a zit on the wrinkle. Which one do you treat? The wrinkle or the zit? I don’t know. And yes, I’ve been called Rudolph too and it’s especially amazing b/c I have a gigantic Roman nose.
Ugh girl, I feel you, I have a pointy witch’s nose. ??
Ah, then you feel my pain!
If it would have been my son I would have put him in a headlock and popped that sucker. I couldn’t take the temptation.
Oh man…. I sooo wanted too! That’s exactly what went through my mind though I never did it.