Pick My Soccer Mom Shirt

soccer mom t-shirt

Let’s get down to brass tacks ladies and gents. I am fallin’ behind with soccer mom paraphernalia. The other moms on my sons’ teams have small closets dedicated to soccer shit- t-shirts, sweatshirts, cutsy jewelry, headbands…..Jesus…..even hats. I’m the wife of the assistant coach and I have 2 shirts- one of which I can’t wear because it’s borderline belly shirt. It’s a medium but soccer.com failed to mention it’s a toddler medium….or an anorexic.

I never want to buy garments that are average or normal. It has to be funny or ballin’ (that’s my new word by the way; please plan to use it in your own conversations this weekend at least 4-5 times). After looking on Etsy, Googling and a local lady that does my friend’s shirts, I have narrowed it down to the following sayings:

GOAL DIGGER

I DIDN’T CHOOSE THE SOCCER MOM LIFE, THE SOCCER MOM LIFE CHOSE ME*

GOOD GAME, GOOD GAME, GOOD GAME, I HATE YOU, GOOD GAME

AS THE SOCCER BALL TURNS (this is kinda’ an inside joke as there is more in soccer then The Bachelor)*

STRAIGHT OUT OF SOCCER PRACTICE

C’MON REF!*

SMILF (This is kinda’ snarky. It means SOCCER MOM I’D LIKE TO FUCK)*

I AM F****** THE ASSISTANT COACH (just kidding, this isn’t one of the shirt options)

*these are ones that I designed in my sick little head

So pick one! I think after you guys select the saying, I’ll have the gal that lives near by (and apparently has a t-shirt factory running in her living room), put it all together. Thanks in advance for voting!!!

 

 

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