Hot Mess Goes To The Hardware Store

This isn’t a long post, just an observation I’ve made about hardware stores. Home Depot or Lowe’s don’t count as they never have enough people working and you can never seem to find someone to help you anyway.

I’m talking about the small, old school hardware stores where the employees look like when they are not on the schedule to work, they are still there, hanging out with their coworkers because they love the hardware store so much. We have 2 in our town: True Value and Do It Best.

Yesterday I went to True Value because when my husband closed the drapes the other night, the brackets fell off. How is he going to walk around in his underwear if he can’t close the drapes?

I was in need of putty….I think. And here is my observation: they don’t even allow me past the checkout lanes to at least try to find what I’m looking for.

It’s like “whoooaaahhh…..easy now lil’ lady. Just where do you think you’re going?”

And I don’t get offended either as let’s be real, it would inevitably come to me tracking someone down anyway. In fact, while I followed the very Amish looking old man, I essentially had diarrhea of the mouth and said, “I have a hole. I think I need putty. I don’t know what I need. Can you please show me what to buy?”

“Is the wall plastic or wood?” He asked.

‘Plastic or wood?’ I thought. ‘I don’t live in a Barbie Dream House. Are plastic walls even an option?’ this had to be a trick question and thank God I came to my senses.

“Drywall!” I blurted, completely proud of myself. “It’s drywall.” Drop the mic.

In the end I walked out with 2 different size of screw/plastic screwy things and putty. Amish guy wasn’t keen on me leaving with putty, confident I would be back in the same position shortly thereafter. I felt like I knew better than him (I know, cue eye roll) and insisted I also buy putty. I gave him some lame excuse that my husband would be angry with me if I didn’t come home with putty because after all, this is 1956, right?