When the World Goes to $hit, Laugh

There are times I have a horrible day, week, month or year; and I mean truly horrible. Normally, I sit back and laugh like a crazy person, shaking my head in disbelief. It’s usually when everything hits the fan and you begin to question if you were born upon an ancient Indian burial ground. I actually had to stop typing there for a minute because I just had an epiphany based on my last sentence. Holy shit, America was born upon an ancient Indian burial ground. Now it’s all making sense. Anyway, I digress.

Gentle reader, I have no advice for you right now other than to laugh. Find things or people that make you laugh. And let me be clear for the trolls of the world. I’m not laughing at everything that is going on. I’m suggesting laughter as a natural anti-depressant.

I know that some of you reading, have lost jobs. Some are suffering or have suffered from the coronavirus. A few of you may live in cities that are going up in flames right now. I think the icing on the cake are the reports of killer bees but honestly, given the state of the world, that’s kinda a non-issue at the moment.

I saw this meme yesterday and it made me laugh:

Now’s the Time to Be a Little Weird

In addition to laughing, you need to take full advantage of blaming all odd behavior on the state of the world. Anytime I’ve been questioned, I look them straight in the eye and say seriously, “this is how I’m coping with everything.” Since 99% of people realize it’s not their place to judge how you deal with stress, this will be deemed acceptable and they’ll leave you alone. A few of the “out of the ordinary” things I’ve done over the last few weeks:

• Wore a ballgown skirt all day at home.
• Drank an 8-gallon drum of margarita for lunch last weekend.
• Took my car for a spin going 80 in a 45. I’ve never had a speeding ticket and just wanted to say fuck it one time.
• Had a complete meltdown Wednesday night (don’t worry folks, I’ll write about that little train wreck).

It’s OK to be Annoyed With the Feel Good Commercials

If I see one more commercial where someone is making a heart with their hands or their showing parents teaching their kids at home, I’m going to LOSE MY SHIT! Usually, after showing 1-2 scenes like this, a soft-spoken man or woman begins, telling us that while we aren’t together….blah….blah….blah…..blah, you know how it ends. As a consumer, I would kill for a commercial that didn’t end with “…..now more than ever.”

How about a wine commercial, where they show a woman on a Zoom call, drinking a large glass of Chardonnay while her kid is in the background, asking for help on common denominators. The camera zooms in on the laptop only to discover 6 other mothers, drinking various flavors of the wine and a plethora of kids, one sitting on a lap, one banging another mom’s head with a pool noodle, etc. See, that’s what I want.

So in closing, here’s what I want you to do at least one time this week:

1. Have a laugh so huge, that your stomach is sore and you’re brought to tears.
2. Do something others would deem weird. Remember, tell them “this is how I cope”. Works every time.
3. Don’t feel guilty for feeling 0 emotion after watching your 80th “we’re going to get through this together” commercial.