10 Reasons I’ve Never Liked Kohl’s

I know, I know, there are a lot of Kohl’s fanatics out there and I’m sorry, like super sorry I don’t like Kohl’s. I fully understand this is like someone telling me they hate Target which in my mind, are fightin’ words. I’m not saying I haven’t tried to like Kohl’s, I really have. My mother-in-law and several friends adore it. They almost had me when they added the Vera Wang line years ago until I realized pretty much every piece could qualify as maternity.

So here’s my list of why I don’t like Kohl’s. Please don’t argue my points. We all have little “hang-ups” that bother some, but not others. Like if someone has horribly protruding ears, that’s the first thing I notice and while I wouldn’t say it repulses me, I’m not a fan.

The “Discounts”

Long, long ago when we were just stupid consumers, we would be in “awe” when something was $54.99, marked down 40% AND you could use a coupon. Are you kidding me? Yes please! Kohl’s starts with something that is $54.99 but then the little computerized sign says 40% AND you can use Kohl’s cash. To date, I’ve never accumulated Kohl’s cash.

An ADA Compliant’s Worst Nightmare

If you are looking for clean, wide, open spaces, you’re not going to find it at Kohl’s. Going down an aisle is on par with older streets that allow cars to park on both sides and where one car has to pullover and wait for the other car to drive on.

I’m Surprised There Aren’t Groceries

This place tries to be everything to everyone in a space not conducive to such aspirations. Jewelry, toy shop, lingerie boutique, home goods, you name, they attempt it. Honestly, I really am surprised they haven’t attempted a frozen food section.

I Don’t Like the Fashion

I don’t know if I fully understand the term “basic” but when I think “basic”, I think Kohl’s. Khakis, polos, leggings, you get the idea. I mean, how long ago was The Hills and Lauren Conrad still has a “line”. I mean, it must be making money because she’s been there for years so great but again, not for me. And can we just talk about the line “Candies”? It’s like the poor woman’s version of Juicy Couture, both equally tasteless.

Jewelry Counter

Paging 1989! It still baffles me that there are jewelry counters with “fashion” jewelry. This may be purely a personal opinion but I can’t see spending the money when the description clearly states “lab-created”, so basically, it’s fake. And they have engagement rings? If the love of your life gets you an engagement ring from Kohl’s, just know alot of thought wasn’t put into the ring you’ll be wearing for THE REST OF YOUR LIFE.

The Store is Always Messy

It’s like a hoarder is in charge of the store visuals. There’s shit on the floor, empty fixtures and clothes piled up in the dressing room. Though everything is always on sale, sometimes you have the clearance rack and that’s a whole other trainwreck. There is no rhyme or reason at all. Unfortunately, because Kohl’s has Nike and Adidas, I am sometimes forced to go there when my sons are looking for Nike or Adidas.

A Sterile Shopping Experience

Because everything is just stuffed into the store and it’s always a mess, there is no room to tell a story. While in college, I worked at Express then for 7 years I was a new store coordinator at the corporate headquarters. I watched how extremely talented visual coordinators made things like wood from pallets and white lacquer work together. They put outfits together that I would never dream to do but that was their expertise. I think Kohl’s would like to do something like that but thanks to the clutter, it’s never achieved.

Herding Cattle

So I’ve never worked on a farm or ranch but you know how there are these 5′ high metal fences set up, sometimes in a simple maze and cattle runs through the labyrinth? That’s how I feel when checking out at Kohl’s. Overall, people are annoyed and tired of waiting but hell hath no fury like a woman who forgot to use her Kohl’s cash.

Dressing Rooms

Similar to the messy store, the dressing rooms are usually a disaster. I’ve never tried anything on but in the past when I’d get my sons set up in a dressing room, there was usually what equated to an entire armoire’s full of clothing hanging on one to two hooks. I know a lot of it comes down to not enough personal to put the clothes back and you can’t rely on customers to return the garments to the racks. As a former retail worker, I ALWAYS put clothes back that I don’t want, it’s just respectful.

You Can Return Anything and Everything

Some may say this is a good thing but I don’t agree. For example, and again coming from a retail background, you would have a very, let’s say “husky” thief. She would dump out a variety of clothes on the wrap desk she wanted to return for store credit. Here’s one of the conversations I had with this thief:

Thief: “My grandma got these for my birthday. They don’t fit.”

I look at the tags. Size 2, size 4, all clearance, coming from the area that’s least monitored in stores. Then I notice an extra-small thong.

Me: “Your grandmother bought you a thong for your birthday?”

Thief, not making eye contact: “Yeah.”

And you were forced to allow the return to take place, knowing that if you accused a customer of stealing, you ran the risk of a lawsuit.

It’s a fine line of having a flexible/good return policy and not valuing the goods you’re selling. I’ve returned something there before that I realized after the fact the gift never even came from Kohl’s and yet they allowed me to return it. So again, I’m sure some of you out there LOVE Kohl’s, I just don’t and that’s ok. Now it’s your turn, do you love or hate Kohl’s?