Hollywood…..Bless Their Hearts…..

I don’t know if it’s a Midwest thing or an American thing but whenever someone tells you a story about someone that is naive or just completely clueless about something, one conveys their understanding to the other by responding,

“Bless their heart.”

So during my commute yesterday evening I began to think of something random as I normally do during the soul sucking 50 minute drive home. Hollywood has so many things wrong on so many levels with regards to “normal people”. Below probably doesn’t even scratch the surface of Hollywood’s clueless mindset with the “average Joe” so feel free to let me know the many ones I leave out. Additionally, I think Hollywood thinks we want to see this which is even more of a slap in the face.

After sex cuddling

Has any woman in their entire adult life, lay in bed snuggling next to their partner immediately post romp? Perhaps I’m just not a sensitive lover here. Please tell me you caught the sarcasm here because I will never, ever refer to my husband nor myself as a lover. That is on par with people who cry during sex because it’s “so beautiful”. After sex, all I want to do is get the Slimmer that crawled up my vajaja out of me.

The romantic notion of working at a restaurant

I LOVE when a 20 something’s sole form of income in a movie or in a sitcom is working at the local diner. She can wear ANYTHING she wants as there is no dress code. That anything is usually a spandex t-shirt, 2 sizes too small, jean shorts and converse.

And piggy backing on what I just noted above….

The romantic notion you can afford a home or an apartment in NYC on a waitresses salary

The middle class

Even as a child I knew something was off with this whole middle class neighborhood set up when I would watch films such as Home Alone or National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation. Is Hollywood’s version of the middle class not always a sprawling white house, a perfectly manicured lawn and a glistening family car in the driveway? It’s like they use the same damn house over and over again.

Every mother wears khakis to clean or just in general

In most commercials featuring a mother, particularly one that is cleaning her home, why does Hollywood think we wear khakis to clean? Have you ever wore khakis to clean? You are excluded from this question if you work at Target and part of your duties would be to clean. Anywhooo, cleaning in my home and probably most homes is your hair in a loose bun, a t-shirt or tank and your nastiest sweats or shorts. Am I right? I can’t run fast enough away from khakis. They are wrong on so many levels and if they have pleats, you my friend should have to pay a tax.

So what did I miss here? I’m going to think of some more on my way to work which if I were a character of a sitcom or movie, I would be driving in my shiny 2016, Ford Flex to my job as a successful Writer of a fashion magazine and my huge, tricked out office because let’s be real here….isn’t that the Hollywood job of the “average jane” in her 30’s according to Hollywood?