Women’s Clothing at Target Sucks

Target

I’m feeling saucy tonight people. I don’t know if that’s a term to use for how I’m feeling but it’s the first thing that came to my mind and I’m gonna go with it. Let’s talk about Target, shall we?

As a middle-aged woman, it’s not only my duty but obligation to love Target. Target on a bad day to a woman is on par with ice cream for a child with a scraped knee. It makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside. There have been times I contemplated skipping down the aisle, stopping at anything that suited my fancy. One day it might be a water pitcher under the Chip and Joann line. Other days, it would be an inexpensive tall boot.

But lately, the clothes ABSOLUTELY suck. I’d say over the past year, I walk in and disappointingly walk right back out. I don’t know if they fired all their buyers and hired Laura Ingalls Wilder and a retiree down in Florida for the mumus but what the actual fuck? I have a dress I bought there and if I don’t cinch it with a belt, this is what I look like:

Goldie HawnEvery outfit is a prairie dress or a mumu, swear to God. At first I thought the clothing was a product of the pandemic. Perhaps they anticipated we would still be on lockdown and so fashioned clothing to be comfortable.

This theory was soon squashed when I learned their muse was Kate Middleton.

I’m sorry, did K-dog go as an American pioneer for Halloween and I totally missed it?

Apparently, she wore some dress and all the “designers” wanted to replicate it because they thought we would want to dress like her.

First of all, her dress was probably couture, thus hugging her body in all the right places. Second, it’s ok to design one dress as an ode to their muse. It’s not ok, to fill the website and every fucking store with 20+ prairie dresses that will look like potato sacks on 95% of the female population.

Target Models

I’m all about getting models that don’t look like prisoners of war. What I’m not about is seeing models on the other end of the spectrum, morbidly obese. While researching for this post, I was astonished to see a woman on their women’s landing page who I’m pretty sure, her stomach wall has given out. It’s like they just can’t get it right. And I get it. I’ve worked for fashion companies and when these women (and men) are in their own echo chamber, they literally don’t know what a happy medium is. They’re so far removed from reality that it’s clearly a struggle to “get it right”.

So what do you think? Have you just rolled your eyes, looking at the Target clothing? Do you think this will pass or is Target a lost cause for affordable, cute fashion?

Share the laughs with friends!

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