I Only Understand 80%


I discovered something recently I’d like to share with all of you. Up until my confession to my husband a few weeks ago, I have never told anyone. Here it goes. I estimate I only understand about 80% of what is going on in movies at any given time.

I understand comedies 100%. Perhaps that’s why I love them so much. If I’m rewinding a comedy, it’s because I want to watch something again. Not because I’m trying to figure out what’s happening. I also almost always understand romances and hardly watch horror or dramatic movies. By the way, if you ever want to know if a movie sucks, find out if it’s been nominated and/or won an academy award. If it has, it’ll be boring beyond belief.

This lack of understanding does carry over to some shows I watch such as West World. In fact, that’s where I paused the finale, looked at my husband and said the following,

“You know, on average, I only understand 80% of what’s going on in movies. I only understand about 80% of this right now. This is my going ratio for just about every non-comedy movie.”

He looked at me as if he was trying to wrap his head around this newly divulged information.

Star Wars

Darth VaderDo you know I’ve watched Star Wars many times, never understanding the entire concept? Up until I’d say last year, I didn’t understand or even notice that Princess Leia, Luke and Han Solo were considered rebels, fighting against Darth Vadar. And right now, as I type this, I’m still questioning if I have this right. And please don’t quiz me on the republic, bounty hunters, senators, etc. because we’re takin’ baby steps here peoples!

Truth Is

The truth is, movies are a form of relaxation for me. When I watch movies, this is to be a time when my brain goes on auto pilot. I shouldn’t have to think about anything when I’m watching a movie. And it’s annoying when you watch say a spy movie and they’re like,

“Jason, if you take out the M87 detonator from the launch pad, the commission will retaliate. They’ll shut down the alphabytes in a heartbeat.”

And I’m like, “what the fuck is the M87, who’s the commission and is an alphabyte a computer thingy? I’m so lost!”

I totally get that details such as these are needed to make a movie realistic and compelling but occasionally, I wish there was a dummy version of the movie or a pdf of notes that I could access with definitions or a summary of the plot.

To this day, there are many, many movies I’ve watched that I never understood everything happening. These include:

  • Every Mission Impossible I’ve seen, which is 3. I stopped watching when Tom became bat shit crazy and joined Scientology.
  • Jason Bourne movies
  • Every Star Wars movie
  • West World¬†most of the time (I know it’s not a movie but you get what I’m saying)

Am I the only one that can’t wrap their head around these types of movies or am I complete dummy? Go ahead, I can take the truth!

Share the laughs with friends!


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