I’m not a long winded person but this post was so long I broke it up into 2 parts. Here is part 1: Enraged with my sister-Part 1
I left off the story dying a little inside inside having to use a port o’ john in the dark on a Saturday night. I walked back to the bar tent to find my sons engrossed in some sort of makeshift air hockey game. By now my sister’s boyfriend had joined us.
“Ready to go?” I said sarcastically.
We headed back outside to tent #2 that was labeled “SKATE RENTAL” and had a line that rivaled a line at any given amusement park. Since this was my sister’s stupid idea I turned to her, put my my hand on her shoulder and said, “well, have fun. I’m going to go find somewhere warm up and attempt to save my toes.”
I had no idea where I was going. I saw a sign that said “Locker Rooms” so I decided to head down the make shift walkway. Locker rooms are always inside and I would just advert my eyes if people were changing or something.
Locker room A: full of 20 somethings. Nope.
Locker room B: completely empty….with a heater. BINGO. So I began to type Part 1 of this story up on my phone. Occasionally people would come in to change into their skates but I sat next to the heater and ignored them.
As a recap, I had reiterated the following points to my sister before ice skating:
A. my credit card had been cancelled due to a hayseed charging a combined total of $1.78 at a Steak and Shake in Florida. I would be cardless till at least the end of next week.
B. After our $72 meal I had $20 leftover. This $20 was reserved for gas since the orange light was on and we still had a 30 minute drive home.
C. My sister had agreed to pay for the boys to skate since I had spent $21 on balls (that’s what she said) for our golf outing earlier today.
Just as I was feeling warm, comfortable and relaxed, typing this story, I received the following text:
I LOST MY SHIT. I had not planned on using a port o’ john tonight, walking a 1/2 a mile in 31 degree weather or sitting in a tent writing this story.
Despite the double date happening just a few feet away I took this time to audibly express my disdain for the situation.
“You gotta be fuckin’ kidding me! What the hell?” I said, talking to my phone.
“That’s it!” I said like a possessed demon. I stood up and walked out of the tent like a deranged crazy person. In my little pink shoes, I marched with all my might to tent #2 to give my sister my last $20 so my sons could have the “experience” of ice skating. I stomped around the still long line to rent ice skates- no family. I peered into the clear plastic windows to P waiving at me. I looked at the enter/exit doors, briefly wondering which way to go in. I decided to go in the exit door.
Sheepishly all 4 of them smiled at me at the same time. They knew I was pissed. They were standing next to a random table. I took my $20 bill and slammed it down on the table.
“HERE! I am E-N-R-A-G-E-D.” I growled looking at my sister with the evil eye. “I will be in locker room B.”
I turned on my heel but quickly realized I left out a vital piece of information so turned back around.
“I need you to leave $10 for gas. My orange light is on.”
Knowing I was not to be messed with right now, all 4 quickly shook their heads.
“Sure, absolutely,” S said.
I went back to locker room B now quickly becoming my safe haven in this ordeal. Here are the texts I received shortly after:
5 minutes later I received a text that they were hitting the rink.
15 minutes later I received a text my youngest was done and hated skating.
20 minutes later I received a text my oldest was done and hated skating.
As I walked out of locker room B and to the bleachers to retrieve my sons and go home, I noticed my sister was taking my youngest to a port o’ john.
As she closed his door and stood there with her hand leaning on the door, I looked at her with a serious stare and said, “I don’t like you right now. I won’t say I hate you because I love you, but right now, I don’t like you.”
So I got home and I am in hour #3 of having hand warmers in my socks.
I am completely wired because of the coffee I picked up while getting gas so I thought I would finish this story. I will NEVER follow my sister’s impromptu plans again. If she wants to ice skate, my sons can come over for a sleepover and they can have at it
I almost hate to click “like” because there’s nothing to ‘like’ about what you had to go through! I hope your feet are warmed up soon!
I’m on glass #3 of wine, the fire place going, flannel pjs, hand warmers still in my socks and watching Chelsea Handler on Netflix. All is right with the world. Bless you for thinking of me!
I HATE the cold. I can very much sympathize with you.
Next year you will be one year wiser and you won’t fall for these impromptu plans! Maybe you can encourage your sister to have a romantic bday for she and her boyfriend next year, and they can stop by for some cake and ice-cream at your nice warm house where you won’t have to worry about running out of gas! Just an idea …
I will never, ever, ever follow her lead again. At one point last night as I attempted to warm up my toes, I giggled out loud when I thought, ‘I should just leave them.’ Then my youngest could get her up at 7 am to make him breakfast they surely didn’t have in their house.
Hee hee! 😉
I am sorry you had to go through all that. I am not a cold liking person either. I can keep most of me warm but my feet always get cold. I have never thought to put hand warmers in my socks. You have cute socks by the way. 🙂
Although this was all a hot mess kind of situation, it was completely hilarious and entertaining to me. I feel like now that I have kids, doing shit is just a pain in the ass rather than spontaneous and fun. I rather be cuddled up under a blanket with a glass of wine in the comfort of my own home with no one around and all of the kids and husband sleeping….